3 Ways to Calm Grief

Calming grief


Yesterday I got a a call no one ever wants to get. A dear friend passed suddenly. I was sitting in a restaurant about to eat a late lunch. My appetite gone. Nowhere to go to let the tears flow. 

I quietly sat with my family with every kind of thought running through my mind. Desperately trying to find an answer that made sense. Desperately trying to find a way to blame myself for not being a better friend. Desperately grasping at anything to make myself feel balanced. 

I cried. I internally questioned everything. And then I did these 3 things that really helped:

1. Spoke with a "safe" person

I called someone who I felt safest with to talk to. This person is someone you can tell anything to, even if it feels silly and they do not judge. This person can be anyone- a friend, family member, colleague or mentor. It doesn't matter, as long as you feel safe. 

2. Sat quietly and meditated

Meditating can help when grief hits. When you allow yourself to focus on your breath you can turn down the internal chatter. Being in stillness allows you to solely focus on your body and allows you to bring the stress and worry levels down, even if just for a little while. 

3. Allowed myself to feel any emotion without judgement

This one is important. When grief hits we get all the "should of" thoughts. I know this because I went through them last night. I also had to remind myself that nothing can change what "is" in the current moment. Giving yourself grace is the best option. Grief has so many layers. So many "should of's". So many stories. Do what makes you feel best. 

Grief is different for everyone. There are so many possibilities to help sooth your soul. I hope some of these I listed can help you. 

I miss my friend deeply. Now I need to be gentle with myself. 

Have a beautiful week, friends. 

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Zen Between the Chaos is LIVE!

It is a glorious day! It has been in the making for more time than I can even imagine at this point, but my new professional website is now live! 

If you have dabbled in my writing over the years, you probably have come to know that I really love making people's lives better in any way I can. I had to take some time to really work on myself more to be able to really help others of course, but I am finally there folks. 

Zen Between the Chaos is now live and ready for your critique (and hopefully maybe your business?). One thing I am not is an expert website builder. I can do it, but man did I want to pull my hair out in the process. Oh and when it officially went live, the mobile version was a HOT MESS. 

I put a ton of my time into this website and I know it still needs love, but for now, it has what it needs to introduce you to what I have to offer. 

If you are a woman (I am not necessarily not specifically working with men, but right now it seems like more women gravitate towards my work than men...) I would love to help you find joy in life again. 

When thinking about who my target market was, I realized she was a lot like me. She is ambitious, hardworking, raising kids, and feeling a little less like herself each day as she tried to do it all and be superhuman to everyone. She woke up one day and thought, "Omg, where did I go? I don't even recognize myself anymore". She was having a lot of success in her life but it wasn't lighting her up anymore. Her soul wasn't being fed like it should. 

So back to me.. The pandemic brought me closer to that breaking point and I finally started the work myself. I started a spiritual life coaching program that really took me deep into my own stuff to help prepare me to work with others. When I completed my program, I was finally ready to combine my yoga studies with my coaching studies, and the Zen Between the Chaos was born.

I will be offering life coaching with a twist.. I incorporate meditation, reiki, inquiry, and yoga into all of my sessions. We track events that happen in your everyday life and use the events to move forward in goals and dreams.

I will also be offering individual yoga sessions. My specialty is focusing on restorative and chair yoga modalities. I enjoy working with those who have bad knees and limited mobility. 

All of my sessions: coaching and yoga will be offered remotely. I will be able to serve anyone who can connect on Zoom or a phone call. 

I am really excited about this work and can't wait to share it with the world. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to reach out to me - hello@zenbetweenthechaos.com.

I will be headed out for my very first vacation since before Baby Bloob was born. We are headed out this weekend to the beach. It just also happens to be his 4th birthday this weekend. How is that even possible?

So my point with telling you that is, I might have some fun stories to tell when I get back and will most definitely have some fun Instagram stories to share if you want to follow along. 

I really truly appreciate all of you who have been reading this blog for years and those who are new and are giving me a whirl. I will be here more often blogging and I hope it brings you some joy. 

Have a wonderful weekend friends, I will see you back here next week (Maybe.. vacation and all..). I will update you all on the trip and look forward to connecting soon! MUAH!!

XoXo

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Hello April!



Happy April! Happy New Moon! We are in Aries season and in case you haven't noticed, the energy has been a little whiney. It took me reading my new moon update to connect the dots of that "woe is me" stuff I have been feeling. I have caught myself complaining a lot this week and wanting to give up in a tantrum like a 2-year-old would. 

Not fun, friends, not fun. 

I know you didn't come here for my rambles, or maybe you did? Either way, I am glad you are here. This is another one of those re-introduction posts. What better time than on the new moon?

I have been busy working behind the scenes learning how to be an entrepreneur and run my own business. You know it is serious when you actually have to hire an accountant to help you get through it all. Math scares me, so taxes always give me heart palpitations on a normal day. 

In early 2021 I decided to start a side hustle doing virtual assistant work for health/wellness/spiritual coaches and entrepreneurs. I was so successful in this area that I almost become overwhelmed. I know, not a bad problem to have, but this was just supposed to be a side hustle. 

Around the time I decided to do this, I also started my life coaching certification because since I could remember I wanted to combine my yoga certification with life coaching. I had this vision and I knew I could make it work, I just needed to get additional tools to get there. 

Today I am working on a website to combine self-development coaching that incorporates meditation, reiki, and yoga principles and my business services.

I approach both areas with an open heart. I can help people in both life and business and it doesn't have to be mutually exclusive to one thing. Coaching can help both business owners/entrepreneurs and those who just need guidance in life. 

I focus all of my energy on what each client needs. This is not about me, it is about you. 

What can you expect from this blog moving forward? For starters, this space has grown with me over the years. It has been around since 2014 and continues to evolve. 

I will still be writing lifestyle posts with a mix of business (fun posts I swear) and spiritual topics. Now when I say spiritual, I mean living a holistic life. It can be a little woowoo at times if you will. It will mainly focus on mind/body/soul topics - yoga, meditation, healing, and other fun topics. 

I am here to educate and guide in all that I do. I have been walking down this path for many years and am super excited to continue to be able to offer you all the knowledge I have learned and to learn from all of you. 

I am offering free meditation on Saturday mornings on Instagram. If you are interested join me at 10:00am EST here. Give me a follow so you don't miss anything exciting coming up!

Thank you for continuing down this path with me and look for at least one new post a week. I want to commit to more but I don't want to let ya down if I don't get more than one up. 

I hope you all have a wonderful Friday!


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How to Find the Best Life Coach for You


Life Coach Tips


Have you been thinking about working with a life coach, but aren't 100% sure what you are looking for or what to expect? 

Today's post will guide you through a couple of different tips to help you choose the right coach for you for the outcome you are after. 

What Kind of Coach Should I Hire?

There are so many different types of coaches out there:
  • General Life Coaches
  • Self Development Coaches
  • Spiritual Coaches
  • Business Coaches
  • Financial Coaches
  • Relationship Coaches
And the list goes on and on and on. You can find a coach for just about everything these days. It can get pretty overwhelming when trying to decide what kind of coach you want, and who fits well with your needs. 

You should start by brainstorming what your end goal is. Are you strictly looking to work with a business coach? What is the end result there? Advice on how to start? Help with scaling your business? 

Maybe you are looking to work on your mindset or get past some bad habits you have that are standing in your way of moving forward in your life. 

It doesn't really matter what it is you want to work on, there is definitely a coach out there for you. But, you need to decide WHAT you want to work on before seeking a coach. Trust me. This will make it much easier to feel comfortable that you are hiring the right coach for your needs. 

What is the Commitment to Working with a Coach?

You have decided WHAT you want to work on, now you need to determine your commitment to your goals.. Start by writing down how much time you plan to spend working on your goals. Remember, coaching takes time. Change won't happen after only 1 or 2 sessions. You need to build that momentum each session to work towards your goals. 

Most coaches have set requirements on how long you will work with them. It is common to be asked to commit to 3-6 months AT MINIMUM. Now you may be thinking, Woah, Woah, Woah, slow down! I want to work on XYZ, not dedicate my life to this person. 

To be fair, your coach wants you to succeed. They can't help you succeed in your goals with only 1-2 sessions. This is why you go back to my first recommendation and really know WHY you want a coach. This is an investment for you. You are investing in yourself to help better an area (or 2 or 3) of your life. 

Connecting with a Coach


Every coach has a different style and things they consider their expertise. Setting up a call with the coach before starting work with them is usually required, but should be something you do even if the coach does not automatically offer it. 

You will be spending quite a bit of time communicating with this person. You want to make sure they are a good fit for you and can help you with your end goal. Not everyone will mesh with you and that is okay. You could be recommended to the BEST COACH EVER according to your best friend or Google, but if they don't align with you, the work will just feel like work. You won't be excited about it.

How Much Does Coaching Cost?


Coaching can range in price depending on the programs offered, experience, and whether the coach is sought after. According to Bark the average cost for coaches in 2022 is between $65 and $125 USD an hour. Your coach may charge you by session or ask for the first 3 months to be paid for in advance. This is important to ask when booking. 

Now that we have gotten through all of that, do you feel more confident when making a decision in a life coach? I sure hope you do. 

I am here to answer any questions you may have about coaching in general or about the coaching I personally offer. I do offer self-development coaching with a spiritual twist. That just means I add things into the session like meditation and Reiki healing. These modules are very effective in accomplishing goals for growth development. 

Leave any questions in the comments and follow me on Instagram for more tips and motivation on how to create the life you have always imagined. 

Chat soon, friends!


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Lets Get Metta



When you hear the word Metta, you are probably thinking about Facebook and their new identity, or whatever that is. They are actually called Meta, with one T. I just want to clarify, we will not be taking a closer look at the name change of Facebook, although that could be fun another day.
Tomorrow is the first day of February and what does the second month of the year normally signify, other than more winter, if you live somewhere that gets snow. February can be a doozy sometimes for snow. 

If you guessed the month of love or heart health month, you're correct! This is why I have decided the theme of the month will be Metta - which means positive energy and kindness towards others. Metta is often known as loving-kindness meditation. 

The goal of metta meditation is to cultivate kindness for all beings, including yourself. When I think of days like Valentine's day, I often think about loving ourselves and doing nice things for ourselves rather than buying and expecting from others. 

Practicing self-love and metta is such a powerful thing. It not only allows you to fall into a better relationship with yourself but also with others around you. Our relationship with ourselves often shows up in how we handle relationships with others. 

If you are ready to focus on the heart chakra and bring all the love this year, I invite you to join my Facebook group, Zen Between the Chaos.

 I will be hosting weekly live meditation and mindfulness exercises on Saturday mornings. In the month of February, we will focus on love and the heart. We will do metta meditation, self-love affirmations, heart chakra activations, and other exercises to align with the theme. 

The group is a safe space for those who identify as women. I hope to see you there are we celebrate a month of love. Stay tuned here for more here as we stick with the theme on the blog as well!

Namaste loves!

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